Friday, June 10, 2005

The Airport...people watching

So, here I sit at the airport in Houston TX. I've been here for almost three hours and am currently sitting and people watching. My flight leaves in about half an hour so I will make this short and quick. I'm in a small part of the airport and fortunately they decided that it's important to have alcohol available to those that are interested. There is a full bar within view with several patrons taking that last drink prior to their flight leaving....Michael Jacksons trial is on the TV and many are watching in deep anticipation of the outcome. There is a your girl sitting across from me with headphones on in her own world...funny with the invention of the modern electronics how we tend to "tune out" rather than interact with those around us. I sat at the bar earlier and had a couple of drinks. Chatted with a man from CT for a while heading back home. I enjoy hearing about other peoples travels and life...makes me worry less about mine. So the girl with the to her is a young man who would probably love to talk to her but she is so absorbed in her music that she isn't interested. They are about the same age and it would be interesting to see them interact. Another girl sitting beside me is currently placing her headphones on to block out any unwanted intrusions. She is writing in some sort of small notebook. I wonder as I write, Is she writing about me or the others around me?? I would love to chat with anyone that would but most just want to be left alone.... Some people are reading or just acting like they dont want to be bothered. Carrying an array of backpacks and suitcases...purses or any color...some in suits and some in sweats. A woman across the waiting area is stretching her legs after, I presume a long flight or at least a long wait. The atmosphere is dull to say the least. No excitement no thrill....just tired passengers in a hurry to get wherever it is that they are heading whether it be home or somewhere for work or pleasure. So, here I sit...just like the rest....waiting.....

The stress level is better now than last night. I spent my morning finding the Fed-ex building and then finding a place to cash my paycheck...the company that I am working for is not paying me correctly and that is another thing that I will have to deal with at some point....not today! It ended up costing me almost $40 to get my check cashed and I plan to have the company reimburse me for that amount...wouldn't have had the charge if they had direct deposit like they were supposed to. There is another young girl across from me traveling with (i'm guessing here) her grandmother and she is on the phone bitching about some flight delay that she had....welcome to flying!!! The waiting area is thinning out a little now as one of the flights has boarded and ready to leave now. I am almost certain that half of those still waiting are going to be on my flight....

I spoke to Randall today and he is meeting me at the airport in Louisville when I arrive. It is actually nice to know that someone actually wants to see me. I am still feeling a bit sorry for myself...I am feeling like I really have no true friends and it's a little lonley. Sometimes I wonder if I should pick a spot and try to place roots but the bigger part of me just wants to continue to travel and see all the places that I can see and experience. Maybe someday I will setttle down....not today though.

My flight is being delayed now...crew isn't available yet. I suppose that IKt will be late when I get in tonight but at least I wont be arriving to an empty airport...or an empty feeling (I hope).

Homesick...yes, I'm HOMESICK!!

I dont really know if it's home-sickness or if it's just stress!! I'm finished with my third week on the job and the job is going great but the company that I work for is fu**ing horrible! I arrived in San Diego with not much $$ left from my stash. It costs a lot to drive half way across the country. So, not to worry I told myself. I was only a week away from a paycheck and I was alone, so If the food situation was slim then maybe my body would be too...ha ha! So, when it was time for my first check, I waited....and called....and waited...and called...and called...and waited!! Well you get the picture. So here I am now with two teenage boys in the house (Corey and his friend Jason) with NO food and NO money!! And my company says "sorry"!! At 35 years old, I called my Dad and asked to have him send $$ for me. I also needed to book my airline ticket to go home to get Trinity so again, Dad helped me out!! Talk about feeling like shit!! It really sucks to have to ask your parents for $$ when you are a full grown WORKING adult!! Finally, last weeks pay came through for me...although it was short by about $400!! I was told "dont worry, we will put it on your next check" yeah...easy for them to say!! They didn't have to just ask "Dad" to wire money!!!

So here we are waiting for week two's paycheck to come.....

I called the company this morning because the check hadn't posted to my checking account and I was told "we're sorry, it didn't go direct deposit like it was supposed to but I have a check for you here in my hand...what do you want me to do?" Well...what I wanted to say was for them to "fly your fu**ing @$$ out to California on the next "red=eye" and bring me my damn money!!" However, I held my breath (Corey keeps telling me that I'm too mean with people and basically he thinks that you get more with sugar than with vinegar) maybe he's right?? So it was concluded that the $$ would be fed-exed to me to arrive by 10:30am tomorrow, Friday. This is all good and fine.....know what time my flight leaves tomorrow?? 11:30am!!! I sit hoping against hope that the fed-ex guy will deliver early tomorrow so that I can make my flight with a little hope of some cash!! I have $40 in my pocket and $-23 in the bank currently!! My auto insurance wasn't paid (just realized that yesterday), my car payment is LATE, my student loans are LATE, I owe my Dad about $500....and I'm so stressed out that I cant even relax!!

Oh yeah...I almost forgot!! My company called me today to tell me that the almost $1000 that they owe me for my travel and license reimbursement isn't going to come till next week!!! Do you think that will happen??? Not Likely!!!

Realize that even if I do get a check tomorrow...there isn't ANYWHERE here that will cash the damn thing for me....outta state check ya know?? So.....I will have to hope that somewhere in Louisville, I can get a check cashed!! Or, maybe I can cry and beg and plead a little with who knows who to get some help???? I feel so lost, angry, alone, and pissed!! Then to top it all off, I dont even know how I am going to get my stuff packed up in the $300 rental truck that I have reserved??? No one is going to be available to help....great??@!@ So, right now I am thinking that I may just pass the rental truck, get a van or something and just take the stuff that is sentimental to me?? Who knows? Maybe I should just keep stuff in storage for now and go home later to deal with this? If I just go home and get my baby (Trinity) and give her a hug....I'll feel sooooo much better!! Know what?? I miss my Daddy too!!!!